/ Dating philadelphia speed /

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The next book I'm writing deals extensively with this sort of thing because I see too much of it, but I'll give you a little preview right here.Basically, you have to start by dumping that Carmen Electra vision of your future girlfriend that I know you hold dear, and start working in the real world of genuine, flawed women -- and you have to start at the bottom.

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***QUESTION***

Hey David,

I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am. Just to set the record straight, I'm in my early 40s, short (5' 7"), slightly overweight, and have been out of work for a while. Before getting your series, I had had one date in five years... That's right: Just one! Now, I have to juggle a bunch of dates from 21 to 41 years old at various levels of connection, from casual dating to wild, uninhibited sex. You're the man!

Here's my dilemma: At the moment, there are four women I am really connecting with and Valentine's Day is coming up. Although I'd love to invite all four over to my place for a wild party, it ain't gonna happen. The women know that I'm not in an exclusive relationship with any of them, but I still need to figure out how to deal with them this Feb 14.

Any ideas?

OHD Rosamond, CA

» MY COMMENTS:

Yea, I have an idea.

Shut your pie hole!

No one likes you... men hate you, AND women hate you.

I, of course, love you.

Now, back to your question.

Seriously, if I were you, I'd leave town.

Really.

No kidding.

"Rosamond, CA" sounds LAME anyway, so drive somewhere cool for the day, and go out to a hip bar that's FULL of single women who have no man to love them... and use some of those great skills you have to make a lonely woman happy.

Cummon, it was the obvious answer, wasn't it?

This is THE elegant move that will only make you more desirable. And it will give you the opportunity to "reschedule" four totally separate evenings with the four women you're "really connecting with", and allow them to plan a wonderful "Valentine" evening for you's two (as Joe Pesci would say).

By the way, I really found it entertaining to hear that you're "juggling a bunch of dates"... "from 21 to 41 years old"..."at various levels of connection"...

[and here's my favorite part, where you describe those "various levels"... of "CONNECTION"...]

"...from casual dating to wild, uninhibited sex..."

Wow, man. You've got all the bases between casual dating and wild, uninhibited sex covered, huh?

Deep, man. Deep.

But then again, what should I expect from a guy who had one date in five years... (I'd make fun of your age, height, weight, and joblessness, but as you've already figured out, these things only matter if you don't have any GAME).

Rock on!

/ Dating philadelphia speed /

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